I'm so bored of little gods,
while I'm standing on the edge of something large,
while I'm standing here so close to You . . .
I find I'm always better at writing things than I am at saying them. Not that I'm terrible at speaking, but when I write I have time to think through my words. And I can see them in front of me. Spoken words tend to dissipate. Written ones don't leave so easily.
"Don't it always seem to go, but you don't know what it's got 'til it's gone."
I said goodbye to a dear friend last night. She's moving to England today. I find it easy to relate to the above lyrics in situations like this. I don't think that I took her friendship for granted, but when someone is around and always available, I just don't think as much about how important he or she is to me. And Moey has been an important part of my life for these past few years. Her friendship has meant alot to me.
There are some people who, when you meet them, you know you are going to be great friends. And then there are others who take you by surprise. Moey was one of those people for me. Every time I got to know her a little better I was pleasantly surprised. She's not someone to wear her heart on her sleeve, so it took a little time to really get to know her. I always appreciated her honesty and her compassion. She takes care of people like nobody I've ever met before. She was always a joy to be around. I loved going into Vancouver to visit her. She taught me to appreciate good movies. If it wasn't for her, I'd be watching movies with Ice Cube or the Rock in them all the time or something.
Change is a funny thing. When you think about it, most change involves some element of death. There is an old way of life or thinking that must be left behind for a new way. I couldn't help feeling that as I said goodbye to her last night. We will most definitely keep in touch. And I hope to visit her at some point in the next couple of years. But there is an old way of life that we both had to let die in order for her to change, and ultimately, to grow. I think that is what has kept me going this whole week, the fact that I am just overjoyed to see her step out into some kind of new life. It's sad that Vancouver Moey has to go, but it is only good for her in the end. Our lives will be different without her, but I know that in the end God works out all things for good in all of our lives. Who can tell what the future holds for any of us? We can only make good decisions and leave the results in God's hands. And that is what Moey has done.
So Moey, if you ever get to read this, know that you will be greatly missed. Keep in touch. And know that we're praying for you. You're going to make it. I don't know what "making it" looks like for you, I only know that it will be good. And God is on your side. That makes all the difference.
Goodbye, dear friend.