Tales of a Secret Rockstar

I'm having a better week.
I've started to get a little bit creative again. That's always a healthy sign.
To me, creativity is like this stream that flows in me. Sometimes it trickles and sometimes it gushes. The thing about it is that it's a pretty good gauge of my life situation at any given time. And this summer has been a very low point, not just for creative energy, but for energy in general. I was getting very concerned about this general lack of motivation. But yesterday I decided to write a movie. I don't know if I'll ever really finish it, but at least I'll try.

The problem I have is that i start things like this, but then I never try to finish them. i'm always afraid they'll suck. I think I need to start taking creative risks and actually try to finish things that i start.

In other news, I might be getting a raise.
Pretty cool.
God knows how to look after people.

I just wrote about my band's cd release party/farewell show last night, and then when I tried to publish it, it somehow got erased.
Show was fun.
I met people.
I got invited to a toga party today.
Meeting people is good.

I had this great discussion with Luke and Aaron (our bass player) about God, culture, and politics. There were some other topics as well, but those were the main ones. Aaron is a dialectic materialist marxist. He is very intelligent, interesting, and challenging. It was cool to hear his point of view, even if I completely disagree with it. I ended up sharing C.S, Lewis' threefold arguments for Christ's divinity, which I never thought I'd use.
All in all, a stimulating discussion with two relatively drunk men.
What a great night.

Artless forms
drift up and down,
on the streets
of this pale town.

Gravity took its toll on you.
Can you see it in me?
Gravity took its toll on me.
Can you see it?
Give me wings and I'll push against it
All my might in this one thing
I'll push it up
Till the dark sky bleeds with sunlight

I just got back from the casino about 20 minutes ago.
That's right, the casino.
Michelle, the only really fun girl left to work with at Subway, and I decided that we needed to take off to the River Rock Casino after our shift. Our shift ended at 11.
We went because she's all sad about her bastard boyfriend being an idiot and cheating on her.
I got to tell her that God likes her today. She thought that was the best thing anyone had ever told her.
Then we went to the casino, along with her brother.

It was so fun. I took 20 dollars, and limited myself to that. We basically played the 25 cent slot machines all night. Everything in the casino is so colourful and noisy and exotic. You truly lose all sense of time in a casino. I felt like it was afternoon, even though it was 1:00 in the morning.
I ended up losing my 20 dollars.
I look at it as being the same as spending 20 dollars at Playland or something.

I thought it was ironic that I got to tell Michelle about God, and then take her to a casino.
I'm a horrific Christian, but I think in the best way possible.
I want Michelle to know God.

I've decided that for some reason I am only attractive to high school girls. I cannot for the life of me figure out why. But it seems that only high school girls like me. This, of course, is a problem. I came to this conclusion after a humorous Subway experience tonight. These two girls came in, and the girl who ordered the sandwich was into me. I could tell from the minute she started talking, because she didn't stop talking. She told me about how she works at Orange Julius in the mall, and how I should come by there and get an Orange Julius. I told her I don't like Orange Julius, because the idea of Orange juice in any kind of smoothie is repulsive to me. She told me about how the juice is fresh squeezed and how she picks out the moldy oranges herself. I proceeded to tell her (I desperately make conversation sometimes when I'm at work) how I was at the mall that day trying to buy a shirt. It was orange. It was on the sale rack at American Eagle. I didn't buy it because summer was almost over, or at least that's what I told her. She and her friend decided I could start the trend of wearing summer clothes in the winter. Little do they know I've already started the trend of wearing nothing in season ever. Anyways, I was hoping for a tip. I didn't get one.

Why am I only attractive to high school girls? I don't know. Maybe when I'm 26 I can be attractive to college girls. At this rate I'll marry someone when I'm 30. And that someone will be 22. Just like my dad and mom.

I should go back to Bible College. Maybe CBC. I hear they have wives there. I like wife.

Haha!

So the comments system is internal now.
Brilliant!

The Tales of a Secret Rockstar continue unabated . . .

Well, I got this little site back online.
Unfortunately it was at the expense of my comments section.
I'll work on that.
I'll miss the girl's comments though, they were great.

So much to write about. I have way too much time on my hands all the time these days. I was up until 4:00 this morning. I couldn't sleep. So I lay in my bed and thought. And watched this really charming movie called "Next Stop: Wonderland". It was really good. Especially at 2 in the morning.

Victoria was so much fun. So much happened and I don't feel like writing about it. I just woke up half an hour ago. This is not when I do my best thinking.
Or writing for that matter . . .

I walked all the way to the library, now I have nothing to do.
I should just start waking up at 4:30 and going to work.
I could sleep for 18 hours a day.